You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
