Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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