It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
