And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize