So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
so that wasnt chicken after all
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
i now understand why vodka
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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