how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
