How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
This is the high leading the old right now
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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