I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize