that's an acceptable place to lick
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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