Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize
