are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
