They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
