I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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