Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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