i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I AM VODKA MAN
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize