Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
