its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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