we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?