8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
