She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Randomize
