Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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