I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
