You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize