It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize