I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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