dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize