Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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