All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
That's intense
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
