South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
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Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
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Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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