let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
