I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize