Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
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