Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
