alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
they're like a gay fantastic four
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
