i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
