Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just gift wrapped bread.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
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