Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
