I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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