You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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