Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
