Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.