I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
