Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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