Where did you get a picture of my penis
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
