i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I want her autograph on my taint
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Randomize
