How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
If I die, sorry about rent.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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