nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize