he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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