You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
