No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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